I have saved the justice department a ton of money in the past few days. How, you ask?
Well recently, Missouri Senator Todd Akin said in reference to woman getting pregnant when raped,
“It seems to me, from what I understand from doctors, that’s really rare…If it’s a legitimate rape, the female body has ways to try to shut that whole thing down.”
It got me thinking, if there is such a thing as “legitimate” rape and “illegitimate” rape, then surely there must be other crimes or injustices that can be warranted as “legitimate” or not.
On Sunday my friend Jay was mugged, and got his phone stolen. He wanted to go to the police station, but I asked him to consider if the robbery was a “legitimate” or “illegitimate” one. Maybe if he didn’t have a phone, he wouldn’t have been mugged. Therefore it’s his fault, and there is no reason to go to the police.
On Monday, my friend Geneva went to the store, but the owner wouldn’t sell her anything because Geneva’s a Muslim. She wanted to go to the police to report “discrimination”. But I wasn’t quite sure this was legitimate discrimination. After all, she is Muslim. That’s not the owner’s fault, it’s hers.
I gotta tell you, Todd Akin, is helping this country save a ton of money with us now being able to identify the difference between “legitimate” and “illegitimate” crimes. I’m thinking we may have to release a lot of murderers from jail because it’s not their fault that their victims were in the wrong place at the wrong time.
Like this? Check out Political Subversities’ live show in NYC!